Year / 2012

by Greg

Please and Thank You

Thank YouOne thing that our son Cameron is good at is common courtesies. He’s very good at remembering to say “please”, and he’s nearly flawless with “thank you”, and he’s famous for his, “Wehcm.” (That’s his version of “you’re welcome”, said quickly with an emphasis on the harder “m” sound to end the word.)

Not sure why he picked up on the practice more than the other children, but it comes natural to him, whereas it’s less so among his siblings.

This past weekend I was talking with our niece about life as a big family. She has said before, and maintains still, that she wants to have lots of kids some day. (And many times hence I have brought up that topic, to ascertain what would create such a desire in her…) 🙂 I mentioned to her that I’ve learned through the years (especially since our family has grown larger) that patience is a huge key to life as a large family.

“Do you feel like you’re a patient person?” I asked her.

“Well, yes… unless they don’t behave,” replied she.

(Now, stop! It’s not nice to snicker!)

She added, “Like, your kids. They are the most well-behaved kids I know!”

After letting a quick laugh escape from my lips, I informed her that they are definitely not always “well-behaved”. In fact, many and sundry images of that non-well-behaved behavior flashed into my mind as I uttered those words. And I remembered why I said patience is very important…

“You know,” I continued, “One thing—maybe, the thing—we really try to stress with our kids is to think of other people: consider others more than yourself. I think that’s probably a reason that you saying they are the ‘best behaved kids’.”

She agreed, and we talked a bit more, but I dwelled on that thought a bit. I wondered if maybe that is the core of what I want to pass along to our kids.

Certainly I want them to know Jesus, and to learn to listen to Father and walk in step with the Spirit. And I want them to understand the Good News, that ‘while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us’; and, ‘So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God.’; and that, ‘Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure.’

That’s most important, and I believe when we know that—at our core, as our foundation—then we are more able, more ready to consider others. When we are valued, we can more properly value others.

And, at least in some way, I hope that Cameron’s simple expressions of courtesy show not only his consideration and respect for others, but that it evidences at least the beginnings of a deeper reality from whence such behavior has its source. And similarly that the ‘good behavior’ exhibited by his siblings is a fruit of a deeper root rather than a mere act of habit or will.

That is my hope. And my goal.

As I thought of this today, I decided to make homemade Thank You cards for all of my kids (and Jen) for the Christmas gifts they thoughtfully purchased, wrapped, and gave to me. I drew a little Christmassy drawing on the front of each and wrote a one- or two- sentence personal greeting inside.

Cam has had a really hard day today, so when I first saw him (after a work day in my office) he was crying and very frustrated. After making sure I had his attention, I gave him his card, and asked if he’d like me to read it to him. He agreed, and when I did, a smile came across his face and he asked me to read it again. And then again. His countenance was very much lighter, and I made his day just by saying a personal Thank You. (And I don’t think his card even had a “Thank You” in it! Ha!)

Little things matter, to be sure. And even more so if they come from a bigger, deeper foundation of thinking of others more than yourself.

Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.

Treat others in the same way that you would want them to treat you.

A simple please and/or thank you is a good step in that direction. (Or a good evidence of a deeper peace where such courtesy has its origin.)

I hope you have a chance offer this simple courtesy—or maybe be on the receiving end—sometime soon.

And… Thank you for reading. 🙂

by Greg

Communication Curmudgeon

texting-classI think I’m becoming ‘That Guy’. The old guy who laments the passing of the glory days of yesteryear, and lambasts the continuously degrading patterns of behavior exhibited by each successive generation. Yep. Sometimes, that’s me.

For example…

I find myself frequently commenting on my son’s tendency towards wearing his hat backwards, purposely wearing socks with plastic sandals, and other such “fashion trends”… (though, regarding the hat, I may not have a leg to stand on there, since I might have donned said headgear, in such a fashion, in my younger years.) 🙂

And perhaps the thing that most irks me of all the current trends in our culture (led predominantly by the younger crowd?) is the proclivity towards shortening phrases into acronyms or initialisms that somehow become words to all who are willing to accept such communication.

LOL is not a word, contrary to that very assertion by the Oxford English Dictionary!

My son has really taken a shine to expressing his creativity through writing. He’s always loved to read, and has an off-the-charts creative, outside-the-box mind, and lately he’s found an outlet for all of that in fiction writing. He’s working on several novels currently, and has completed a few short stories (including a Christmas-themed story just completed this week).

Good for him! He is definitely creative, full of ideas, and expresses himself fairly well for his young age. And he seems very willing to learn, receive instruction, and work towards bettering his technique and improving his craft.

One way he has chosen to do so is to connect with other writers in his age range. About a year ago, Ian invited several people he knew, as well as send out an open invitation via certain select channels, to gather monthly for the purpose of discussing current projects, receive honest/thoughtful critique, and also simply connect/network with people of a similar ilk. A small group of writing enthusiasts has formed and been a fun part of Ian’s and our life over the months since.

But, in that this group is comprised of youngsters aged 11-19, there have been occasions where the integrity of the English language has been somewhat compromised.

(Can you imagine?!)

“Words” such as ‘BTW’ and ‘LOL’ are frequently employed, when, I know on good authority that these young folks could certainly find much better ways to express their thoughts, if only just actually writing out what they are “saying” via the initialisms chosen. (Is it that hard to write, “By the way,”?)

I began this linguistic integrity campaign when my oldest son was first given access to a computer, set up with an instant messaging account, which he would use to communicate with me during my work days. (Interestingly, he’d message me at my desk, which is only two floors above where he was, in the same building…) I would remind him to use proper grammar, spelling, and sentence structure (as much as he knew), including capitalization and punctuation. There would often be do-overs, as well as instruction, and I think it has helped him form good writing habits.

And yet, ‘BTW’ is slowly becoming part of his lexicon. (By definition, can initialisms and acronyms be part of a lexicon?)

But I digress.

Here’s my main point: Words matter.

Should we care that texting shorthand, as well as probably all social media platforms, are pushing “words” like LOL, BTW, TTYL, BRB, etc into official English language dictionaries? I believe so. I know it’s probably overkill, overreaching, overreacting… over-everything. BUT, it seems to me that technology has made us lazy, and ignorant. I’m not suggesting that all who use popular slang acronyms/initialisms are ignorant; of course they are not. (Lazy perhaps, but not all ignorant.) So, with that knowledge, other than the obvious limitations of a device for informal communication—a cellphone with only a numeric keypad being one example—why would we use such ‘terminology’? (I use that word loosely.)

It surprised me to discover that such terms are actually being accepted into a respected, authoritative English dictionary. Insomuch as they are not actually words, rather a “word” created by using the first initial of a string of words (acronym/initialism), it seems paradoxical to include them there.

But, there they are. And I’m not sure anything I post here, will slow down the momentum of our technology-driven society towards “r” and “u” and numerals in place of their homonym (4, 2, 8, etc), and, the Oxford English Dictionary pronouncing “BFF” a word in the English language. One hundred forty characters, small (mostly unusable) keyboards, and instant communication leads us on towards a much lesser language, in my humble opinion. (Oh wait, I could just say, “IMHO”.) 🙂

An interesting observation in favor of embracing the evolution of our language was made in an article titled FYI: English language continues to evolve – OMG!, linked below. Here’s an excerpt from that:

The old fuddy-duddy in me wants to object to the inclusion of the likes of BFF and wassup (yes, seriously) in the most canonical record of the English language in existence. Meanwhile, the modernist in me recognises that language must always be a fluid thing. Where would we be if English was locked in a fixed state without the ability to introduce new words while others fall quietly into obsolescence? How would we describe PCs and CPUs? What cumbersome form of words would be required to explain the internet? Or a blog?

Indeed, such is the pace at which our inter-connected world changes, that it should be no surprise that our language continues to evolve with similar alacrity. New words and expressions should be cherished not cursed. After all, that William Shakespeare fellow invented new words – or converted verbs into nouns (and vice versa) – with regularity to serve his own purposes, many of which still exist in our contemporary vocabulary. It is thought that over 1,500 common words such as assassination, auspicious, bloody, fitful, invulnerable, obscene, road and suspicious were first used by the Bard. Not to mention expressions like ‘brave new world’ (The Tempest), ‘for goodness’ sake’ (Henry VIII), ‘hoist with his own petard’ (Hamlet), ‘star-crossed lovers’ (Romeo and Juliet), ‘pound of flesh’ (The Merchant of Venice) and ‘what the dickens’ (The Merry Wives of Windsor).

If it was good enough for Shakespeare, it’s good enough for me.

Certainly, as the world changes, new words are invented. However, shouldn’t they actually be words? Not unpronounceable initialisms? (One fine example of a new word from an acronym is the word laser, which was the shortened/simplified way of labeling the new technology Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation.)

OK, (Uh oh! Another not-real-word!) enough curmudgeoning for the day. I do hope that you’ll take some time to browse the articles I found on this subject, listed below. I found them to be interesting, thought-provoking reading. And, of course, I will continue to strive to preserve the integrity of our language (both in verbal and even more so in print) despite cultural trends.

I guess that really does make me a Communication Curmudgeon.

Maybe I’ll make myself a t-shirt…

Related reading:

by Greg

Christmas All Year Round?

Christmas GiftWe’re getting really, really close to Christmas Day. Have you noticed? Throngs of folks out picking up gifts for everyone they love—and maybe some they don’t—all hoping that the recipient will feel the love held for them by the giver through the gift chosen and given.

It’s kinda fun, actually. (Except for the “throngs” part. Crowds are not my… “thing”.)

But tonight as Jen and I were out getting a few last things for the Big Day, I couldn’t help but think (and say… I’m still not very good at ever not saying something that I think…) that perhaps the reason I don’t involve myself in the gift giving frenzy as much as many others I observe is this: I love to give gifts every day!

That probably sounds weird… I’m not constantly looking for, purchasing, nor ever wrapping in colorful papers various items perfectly suited to all of my family members, extended relatives and close friends and presenting them to them at equally various gatherings at homes. I’m really not.

But I do like to buy things for the people I love. (Even some I just like.)

Tonight we stopped by a Goodwill thrift store which we frequent. As I am wont to do, I browsed the book section and found several good reads, most of which were for a couple of my children. I found one for my daughter—which, given the proximity to December 25th, will be a Christmas present… so… SHH!—and another for our son, who will turn fourteen this coming Tuesday. (Yep! Christmas!)

As I was picking that one out, I thought we might give it to him for Christmas… then perhaps that it could be a birthday gift. Then I just chuckled to myself as I considered just giving it to him tonight!

Jen is a good sport. She LOVES everything about giving (and receiving, I think) gifts on Christmas Day. She plans for, perhaps, up to the entire year before the day and has a big list of everyone in our somewhat large extended family. She must have equal gifts for all (at least those in our household); if not in quality, then in quantity… but really in both. I, on the other hand, am almost never thinking about “what to get [insert relative] for Christmas”. EVER.

Sometimes we’re quite an odd pair. 🙂

Jen said she would support my decision, whatever it may be, on when to give that newly purchased book to Ian. So, I decided to save it for another birthday present. Ian loves books… and I love Ian… and birthdays are about loving the one you love with something they love (at least, in some ways?)—so I chose birthday.

But I had purchased another book that seemed more appropriate to give to Ian upon our return home.

After coming in the house with a few bags of goodies, I began to dole out the books from our little Goodwill bag. I gave Ian the book on grammar that I intended to give to him tonight. He smiled and graciously—even excitedly?—received it. Then I pawed through the remaining half-dozen books for myself, or Jen and others, honestly forgetting that I had chosen to give one of the remaining ones to Ian for a birthday present!

As I lifted that book out, Ian had momentarily glanced somewhere else, so I was able to successfully drop it back in the bag, without him catching a glimpse of the cover. Whew!

Ian laughed and said, “Dad, you’re really not very good at Christmas gifts. You can’t keep your gifts secret!” (Or, something like that.)

Perhaps he’s right. Maybe I’m just impatient? Once I’ve found and acquired a gift for someone I love… I must give it! Maybe that’s it.

But it’s something else.

I really do think that I live a lifestyle of giving. (Note: I am not claiming to be the most generous person, or anywhere close to that.) If I see something that reminds me of someone, or that I know they would love—I get it for them. It doesn’t have to be their birthday, or Christmas, or even Flag Day!. And then, the next time I see them, I give it to them. It’s fun to give!

I know I’m the weird one here. I know people (my wife chief among them) LOVE everything about the Christmas gift-giving season. I know. But I think I might love the other way even more. (And, as already stated, I certainly do participate in the Christmas version of gift giving, too… it just feels funny around this last few weeks of December when I do my normal buy-something-for-someone-because-I’m-thinking-of-or-reminded-of-them thing, but “have to” hold on to it—and even wrap it—because the calendar tells me so.)

It’s at least slightly humorous, isn’t it?

Christmas is now only two days away! Not much longer must I wait to distribute the handful of gifts I’ve saved up over the last month or so. (Whew!) AND, just a few days until I can go back to giving gifts any day I’d like! (Again, whew!)

Does anyone else feel that way? Am I completely alone on this one?

It could very well be! 🙂

Merry Christmas, reader. Enjoy the day, and the greatest Gift of all: Emmanuel!

by Greg

Real Stuff

I am not a food or nutrition “nut”. (And I can’t imagine I’d ever be accused of being so.) But I do keep moving more and more toward making sure that I and my family are eating actual food. Both because of health, and because of taste!

However, there are some holiday traditions (and family traditions) that transcend the “eat real food” principle.

Cool Whip would be one of them.

Much of the fluffy white stuff was consumed atop much pumpkin pie over the past two days (and likely more will be today). There was mention of perhaps purchasing real whipped cream, but that idea was quickly chastised, and Cool Whip was the one and only choice.

And I do admit, it does not taste bad. But as I sampled it, I thought, This doesn’t even have any milk in it, does it? To my surprise, it does: Skim milk and a small amount of light cream. Still, when you see the rest of the ingredients—and you know that whipped cream, at least from scratch, is just whipped heavy cream, and maybe vanilla—you do begin to wonder why anyone would put this substance inside their bodies…

Friday was leftover day, and that meant copious amounts of turkey were consumed throughout the day. Well, what is turkey without mashed potatoes, right? Due to other events scheduled for the day (Ian’s playing in a hockey tournament, and he had two games on Friday!) there was not time to properly address the lack of mashed potatoes problem. Being resourceful—and apparently lax in principle—I grabbed the box of instant mashed potatoes we had sitting in our pantry. (I think it may have been a gift from some friends last Thanksgiving!)

As I was making the fake potatoes, I thought of several things. First, Jen and I used to eat these regularly when we were first married. I think that’s because, second, my Mom used to make potatoes from a box when I was a teenager. (Maybe younger, too.) She makes the real stuff for all holiday family gatherings, now, though. I don’t think I made real mashed potatoes until just a few years ago. Now that’s all that I make, exclusively (…except when we have this box, and we’re in a hurry.) 🙂

When they were finished and I whipped up the little flakes into what resembled mashed potatoes (though somewhat plasticky/rubbery) I recounted those thoughts to my kids as we ate them. Again, they didn’t taste bad—in fact, our eight- and six-year olds sang their praises—but all I could think about was what a bad substitute they are. And I wondered, too, if the list of ingredients could be as crazy as Cool Whip?

Well, let’s have a look at the two pseudo foods I’ve mentioned here, shall we?

Cool Whip

Water, hydrogenated vegetable oil (coconut & palm kernel oils), high fructose corn syrup, corn syrup, skim milk, (<2%...) light cream, sodium caseinate, natural and artificial flavor, xanthan and guar gums, polysorbate 60, sorbitan monostearate, sodium polyphosphate, beta carotene (color).

Instant Mashed Potatoes

Idaho® potatoes, with emulsifier (mono and diglycerides from vegetable oil) and preservative (sodium acid pyrophosphate, sodium bisulfite, citric acid, mixed tocopherols).

Note: The potatoes we had were the Aldi brand, Chef’s Cupboard (I think), and not Hungry Jack. But I figured they’re close enough for the representative photo.

After I read those lists of ingredients to the kids, I got out the bag of potatoes and read the “ingredients” on that: Potatoes. (And we had mentioned that whipped cream is just cream, again, one thing, with maybe some flavoring.)

“Which of those sounds more like something you would eat?” I asked with a knowing smile.

“The potatoes,” said a chorus of children in confident unison.

So my final question here is, what is wrong with us? Why do we put that stuff in our bodies? Is it only because it’s cheaper? Easier? Is it really because of the taste? (I can answer for my wife on the whipped topping question: YES, the TASTE!) 🙂

I find it so fascinating that we treat our bodies this way. It’s not really that difficult to make mashed potatoes from real ingredients, nor obviously to make whipped cream (you just, whip… cream?) but our culture makes icons out of the fake stuff. Fascinating.

Well, aside from some family and holiday traditions that just can’t be broken, we will continue towards eating more and more real stuff. (Including things we grow ourselves!)

And I imagine our bodies will thank us for it.

by Greg

Big Box Thinking

New-ish friend and somewhat-regular blog reader, Jessica, noticed a brief aside in this post not too long ago, and encouraged me to take some time to flesh out the thoughts that I previously quickly prohibited. (They were not directly related to the post being written then, and they also would have likely nearly doubled the length.) I did want to elaborate on the thought—at some point—but hadn’t gotten back to it yet.

Then today, I happened to hear someone lamenting that, “Nowadays, traveling state-to-state, you just see all the same things. The same stores, restaurants, etc. It’s all the same. But we’re not the same!”

Amen, said I.

That’s precisely my point. I believe the previous context was the emphasis we place on the election of the person to the office of President; the weight which we put on participation in this quadrennial event as opposed to the annual (and sometimes more often) elections for people who actually matter more to us in our daily lives.

Somehow we’ve gotten this idea that homogenous experiences trump individual, unique ones.

And so, all of our restaurants are the same. All of the stores we shop at are the same. In a few cases, what used to be many stores are all found in one place now. There is no difference from one city or state to the next, save a few landmarks and geographical differences. (And maybe the way they talk?)

And how could there be? We can travel around the world within a day. In fact, who needs to travel? We can be virtually anywhere at any time, thanks to technology. The “communities” we live in are getting smaller and smaller (along with being more homogenous) due to the accessibility we have to each other.

But is that all it is? Technology? I don’t think so. It feels like more. It seems like more. There is a general desire for a uniform experience, even uniform thinking. This is certainly a quality of human nature. It’s why peer pressure exists (and works), and it’s been employed by and on everyone for, well, probably since we came into existence.

The question is, does that truly agree with our nature? Is that the best thing for us?

As is quite obvious (despite our best efforts to hide it)… we are all different. E-ver-y, single, one of us. We might honestly have much in common with some folks we know, maybe especially our family, but when it comes down to it, we all are somehow, someway different from one another—maybe especially our family!

And that is how God designed us. He clearly made us with unique individual personalities and temperaments, likes and dislikes (loves and hates!), and he even made it more obvious with our outward appearance. As much as we are vastly different “on the inside”, we are just as obviously different “on the outside”. From skin tone to hair color (or lack of hair… color) to shapes of bodies to facial features; the list goes on and on.

We are different. Unique.

So why do we try to be the same?

Do you remember the segment on Sesame Street when we were growing up, “One of these things is not like the other…” The point of the activity was to look at several items and point out the one that was different. In that case, different was wrong, to be singled out and removed, changed to match the rest.

Hmmm… we learn things early in life, I guess?

The political stage is another great example of this. Maybe especially the current environment in our country. You are either liberal/Democrat or conservative/Republican. There are some who are “independent”—including Yours Truly who often trumpets his own libertarian leanings—but really, it often feels like most people are in one camp or the other. Then, depending on your location/current surroundings, there’s generally a consensus one way or the other on the “proper” worldview or ideology. Kinda scary, actually.

When we look at the commercial scene, the ubiquitous homogeneity continues. Chain restaurants are the most popular establishments, and can be found everywhere. When we traveled the country performing our music from ~2000 to ~2005, we discovered chains out west that we didn’t have here in the east, but even many of those are here now, and vice versa. (Not completely, of course. The general direction does seem to be toward being omnipresent, though.) For retail there are the Wal-marts, Targets, Costcos, etc. Each shopping mall across America also houses basically the same list of stores.

Is this good?

I was recently thinking about those restaurants. Even though I do enjoy their food, the fact that it is exactly the same food, same decor, same everything… kind of makes me question the reality of the food I’m consuming there. I mean, in order to achieve such a level of homogeneity, one would assume that there is at least a lack of fresh, local ingredients involved. (And in some cases, one might even question whether the homogenous product is actually consumable…)

(Note: One of our favorites of the chain restaurants is Chipotle. And, while they may meet most of the undesirable “chain” qualifications, I do believe they are somewhat unique in their use of local farms and fresh, local ingredients. Or, it may be that their delicious food has me very biased on this occasion…)

But not everyone is like this. (We are unique, remember?) There are folks who value their local retailers and eateries and groceries—does Wegmans count as our local grocer?? And there are people who care about local politics, local issues, local communities.

Is that better? I’m not sure. I keep coming back to it. I think we are made inside a fairly small enclosure (some of us larger than others) and when it comes down to it, we are only barely in control of just that: us. Everything else is out of our hands. So with our limited control, resources, abilities, and the whole being fixed to one place in time and space thing… it seems like smaller is what we’re made for.

Simpler. Nearer. More focus, more attention, more care given to where we are, who we are with.

Doesn’t that then spill over into the rest of our life? Being that we’re all in different places, with the potentially fewer relationships that cross our paths (though that can change many times over a long lifespan) … does that not precipitate a more unique experience?

I can definitely see the other side. The more experiences you have, the more different people you know, the more different you will be! But the other side of the coin seems to be that the greater our reach geographically, the more we want it to look and be the same.

I’m not really advocating one way over another here, just fleshing out some thoughts that have been surfacing in my brain every now and again. I do think we are made for simpler. But I am also completely aware of the fact that this might be part of my uniqueness. I might be made to be simpler? Perhaps.

However it turns out for you, just remember that you are unique. That could mean that you match a group of friends on 90% of your likes and dislikes and philosophies and worldviews.

But there’s still 10% that’s just you. And that’s definitely something to celebrate.

(Maybe with a nice dinner at your local diner?) 🙂

by Greg

How To Clean Your Bombilla

This post may not appeal to every one of the regular visitors to GregsHead.net, but there continues to be a stream of traffic landing on my previous post, “Clean Your Bombilla“. This post is mainly for you, new and random cyber-guest! (And fellow yerba mate aficionado!)

mate

Yesterday I decided it was time to clean my bombilla again. (You may recall my post, referenced above, about discovering that I ever had to do such a thing at all?) As with the first experience, I was astonished by what I discovered!

I noticed some yerba stuck in the little slots at the bottom of the bombilla, and I couldn’t get them out. When I looked closer, I thought I noticed some buildup of the fine, powdery dust packed into the bottom, too. Gross! But what to do?

Bombilla

I decided to try to loosen it by just knocking the end (rather gently) against the table. What happened then was the big surprise (and forever changed the way I will clean my bombilla!)

The end came off!

This was a fantastic revelation. (I was actually pretty excited!) I’d always struggled to get the pipe cleaner all the way down to the bottom from the top part of the bombilla. Now I had easy access to it!

I began sliding the pipe cleaner in and even scrubbing a bit more with it toward the bottom (that had never really been cleaned) and it got very dirty. Large amounts of blackish stuff was being scraped out, then rinsed out, and this process continued for a couple minutes at least. I made sure to clear each of the slots too, since I had better access to them.

Today I read that using baking soda can help get the inside of the bombilla clean, too, but it seemed to work just fine with the pipe cleaner and hot water.

Finally, after I was satisfied with the clean water flowing through the bombilla, I reassembled it, and quickly added yerba to my mate (and a couple teaspoons of sugar) and enjoyed free flowing yerba mates for the rest of the morning! ¡Unos mates muy sabrosos!

It’s funny how I keep learning new tricks with this mate drinking… very much by accident!

mate y bombilla

by Greg

Conditional Libertarianism

I have been enjoying Ron Paul’s book, Liberty Defined. Enjoying, and finding myself becoming frustrated by it.

See, there’s no doubt in my mind that I am mostly a libertarian. Mostly. I’m not completely one because I understand that people—you, and me—are sinful. We have a natural bent towards doing the wrong thing. (Or, not doing the right thing.) The Bible tells us so, and, well, so do our eyes and our reasoning. So a completely free society, with little to no rules/laws to govern our actions towards others… well, it just can’t work.

And the whole book that thought keeps returning. I keep thinking, You know, he’s so right on! We should have the freedom to choose what we want to do, not be made to conform to some behavior through some law or system of laws and regulations… But quickly on the heels of that thought are the reminders that the hearts of men are selfish and self-serving and devious. (I believe the word is “sinful”.)

George Washington mentioned the importance of morality and religion to society. (Basically, they can’t exist without those foundations.) Many others from the Generation of 1776 expressed similar sentiments. They knew that you can’t divorce liberty from responsibility, and they knew that our natural condition was fallen, sinful. (All of the restrictions built into our system of government are for precisely this reason!)

Does that mean Ron Paul is wrong? No, I still think he’s right, but since we can’t do away with sin, it’s mostly just a utopian view of life together as a nation, that can’t ever be fully realized.

I believe Mr. Paul realizes this, too, and he’s not truly advocating a completely lawless society. (I know he’s not wanting anarchy.)

And he does make some good points.

I recently read his thoughts on Marriage. (Each chapter of the book is essentially a short essay on issues that affect our freedom, and one of them tackled marriage.) I can’t quote the whole chapter, but I do wish you could/would read the whole chapter. (Just click the book cover at the top of this post to purchase a copy of the book, or check it out from your local library!)

This paragraph stuck out to me:

The supercharged emotions are on both extremes of the issue, because neither extreme accepts the principles of a free society. One side is all too willing to use the law to force a narrow definition of marriage on everyone without a hint of tolerance. The other side—a minority opinion—wants the law to help them gain social acceptance even though this is impossible for law to achieve. Those who seek social acceptance of gay marriage are also motivated by the desire to force government and private entities to provide spousal benefits. When dealing with government benefits, this becomes an economic redistribution issue—a problem that would not be found in a truly free society.1

“Neither extreme accepts the principles of a free society.” Wow is that true. We just can’t leave each other alone. We all have our various agendas, and we fight hard to make sure that the state—the law—makes everyone else think and act like we do. I said in yesterday’s post that this definitely won’t work.

So in a free society, each person should be allowed do as their conscience allows or instructs them to, unless it is somehow (actually) injurious to another. Instead, we must fight to be right, or to be accepted.

Paul concludes:

This issue hardly justifies an amendment to the Constitution; passage or even a heated debate only serves to divide us and achieves nothing. It is typical of how government intervention in social issues serves no useful purpose. With a bit more tolerance and a lot less government involvement in our lives, this needless problem and emotionally charged debate could be easily avoided.

His recommendation is to make marriage a private matter. “Though there may be a traditional dictionary definition of marriage, the First Amendment should include allowing people to use whatever definition they’d like.”

I concur. And I concur with much that Ron Paul has to say. (Remember? I am conditionally libertarian.)

If you are looking for a good, thought-provoking, conversation-starting read, I recommend, “Liberty Defined”.

And, in the end, I will continue to agree with people like Ron Paul, who believe in allowing for the maximum amount of freedom possible in a society. Just remember that there must be limits—a conditional libertarianism, thanks to the “condition” of sin.

(Good thing Jesus took care of that in the long run!)

1 – Liberty Defined, Ron Paul, ©2011 Grand Central Publishing, p. 184

by Greg

What Elections Mean

I Voted stickersAnd so it ends. Or, begins? Continues?

The elections are over, and the American people have chosen. Whether state representative, Senator, Mayor, local judge, or President of the United States—we have chosen.

If your guy (or gal) won, you’re elated. Your confidence in the American people is restored or confirmed, and you’re glad that the majority of your neighbors are “thinking straight”.

If your guy (or gal) lost? Well, we’re in for it. We’ll get what’s coming to us. We have made our bed and now we get to lay in it. We can try again in a year or two or four, if there’s still a country left!

No matter which way the elections turned out, this is how the day after would have been. One group or the other celebrating or complaining, depending upon the results.

A Quick Lesson from History

What I have said for so long (here on this blog site, and in many conversations) is that elections are not where changes are made. They aren’t. Elections reveal where we already are. And what I see is that we are a very divided, and even confused nation.

In one way, that’s what we’re supposed to be. In what we call the Federalist Papers, John Jay, Alexander Hamilton, and James Madison laid out the reasoning behind the Constitution, so that everyone in every state could understand the idea of the Union that was being proposed. (There already was a Union, but it was so loose that it really almost wasn’t a Union.) One of their arguments for stability in such a diverse group of people—yes, even when we were only thirteen states, we were very diverse—was that there would be enough “factions” that no one majority group would dominate any minority groups. The more diverse the opinions and “passions” of the group (or faction, as Madison called them) the greater the likelihood of there being compromise; working together for their common good.

Listen to these words from Federalist 10:

The latent causes of faction are thus sown in the nature of man; and we see them everywhere brought into different degrees of activity, according to the different circumstances of civil society. A zeal for different opinions concerning religion, concerning government, and many other points, as well of speculation as of practice; an attachment to different leaders ambitiously contending for pre-eminence and power; or to persons of other descriptions whose fortunes have been interesting to the human passions, have, in turn, divided mankind into parties, inflamed them with mutual animosity, and rendered them much more disposed to vex and oppress each other than to co-operate for their common good. So strong is this propensity of mankind to fall into mutual animosities, that where no substantial occasion presents itself, the most frivolous and fanciful distinctions have been sufficient to kindle their unfriendly passions and excite their most violent conflicts. But the most common and durable source of factions has been the various and unequal distribution of property. Those who hold and those who are without property have ever formed distinct interests in society. Those who are creditors, and those who are debtors, fall under a like discrimination. A landed interest, a manufacturing interest, a mercantile interest, a moneyed interest, with many lesser interests, grow up of necessity in civilized nations, and divide them into different classes, actuated by different sentiments and views. The regulation of these various and interfering interests forms the principal task of modern legislation, and involves the spirit of party and faction in the necessary and ordinary operations of the government.

Doesn’t that sound like us today? Intriguing.

I’m getting slightly off track here. Please click through to Federalist 10, though, and read the rest. (And 9, too, since 10 is “part two”.) Better yet, read all of the Federalist Papers. It’s a great way to understand where we came from, who we are supposed to be (as a nation) and just republican/representative government in general. We recommend The Original Argument, a collection of these papers, “Adapted for the 21st Century” (says the publisher). We read it together with our 13- and 10-year-old sons. Very interesting history/civics lessons!

Back to my point: Elections reveal who we are, they don’t change who we are.

This is very important. Elections are in place because, one, we are a free people who have chosen to elect our representatives/leaders from amongst ourselves, and two, they occur “at regular intervals” to ensure that we remain a free people, and no one elected leader (or group of them) can usurp and retain that power indefinitely.

Elections are definitely important, but it’s not really where (true) change comes from.

Legislating Morality

Do you believe that too many people are being overlooked and forgotten by the systems in place, having to go without good food or medical care because those with money are not doing their fair share to correct this injustice? Do you know that what God cares about most is that we care for those who need it the most? Do you also feel that so many people are just blind to this!? “Why can’t they see how wrong they are!?”

Do you believe that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness? Do you feel that economy, commerce, and thus, communities will thrive if only they are free of heavy—and unnecessary—government intervention, regulation, restrictions, and especially taxing. (AND, do you feel that the money being collected for taxes is not only exorbitant, but equally wastefully spent or more so?) Then, with these truths being so obvious to you, do you feel incredulous that so many people are just blind to this!? “Why can’t they see how wrong they are!?”

…

So, do you truly believe that “those people”—either side—will change if you or someone who agrees with you is given a place of power that would allow them to force—by law—the actions that you wish them to take? Will that actually foster the change you desire?

You can NOT legislate morality. (But… we should stop people from killing each other. It’s rather difficult to co-exist when murder is an acceptable response to a grievance.)

It is right to want to help people, especially the ones who can’t help themselves.
It is right to hate greed, and to stop any actions that are a result of it.
It is right to love freedom.
It is right to encourage personal responsibility and education, and an active love for our neighbors.

But you can’t make that happen by electing someone, or passing a law.

I Think We’ve Been Here Before…

There is a post I’ve not yet finished called “The Tytler Cycle” (the attribution of the “cycle” to Alexander Tytler is questioned, but the veracity of the words are not in doubt, proven by history again and again.)

A democracy is always temporary in nature; it simply cannot exist as a permanent form of government. A democracy will continue to exist up until the time that voters discover that they can vote themselves generous gifts from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always votes for the candidates who promise the most benefits from the public treasury, with the result that every democracy will finally collapse due to loose fiscal policy, which is always followed by a dictatorship. The average age of the world’s greatest civilizations from the beginning of history has been about 200 years. During those 200 years, these nations always progressed through the following sequence:

  • From bondage to spiritual faith;
  • From spiritual faith to great courage;
  • From courage to liberty;
  • From liberty to abundance;
  • From abundance to selfishness;
  • From selfishness to complacency;
  • From complacency to apathy;
  • From apathy to dependence;
  • From dependence back into bondage.

OK, so, different folks will place us (the United States) at various places on that cycle, but most will place us somewhere in the lower part of that list. Where would you say we are?

Regardless, it does seem to be a cycle that we (human beings) can not break out of. It happened many times in the Bible—just read the book of Judges. Every time I read that book I can’t help but think, WHAT are they thinking?? It has happened through history, and it will keep happening.

I do believe we are somewhere on the lower part of the list, but not to the bottom. And I think we, as a society, keep wanting to go further towards bondage. We don’t WANT liberty. We want to be told what to do, what to think… and we want to have everything we need (or want), without the cost or effort it should take to get it.

I believe that was revealed by our elections. We voted for other people to take care of stuff for us: “the rich”, the federal government. I think that is our mindset, worldview, paradigm. (Not all of us, but a majority of us.) It was evidenced by not only the choice for president, but many other elections as well, including various proposals (legalization of marijuana, gay marriage, etc.) albeit in somewhat different applications.

I’ll say it once more: Elections reveal who we are (and what’s important to us), they do not change who we are.

Education, education, education.

A free society, who chooses their own leaders—and also their own laws and codes of conduct, which are based on some commonly understood and agreed upon moral foundation—must be educated. We have public education, higher education, lower education? There’s no shortage of talk about education. But the “short” of it is that we are not educated.

(This—history of education, current state of education—is an enormous subject that I will not attempt to cover here. There are many books… and I have brought it up from time to time already. Browse this tag and this tag, if you’d like.)

The only way real change comes is through generations and generations of education and choices/action. Slavery was outlawed in the U.S. on January 1st, 1808—following generation after horrible generation of a reality that never should have been—but it took until 1865 to officially set all of the slaves free. And then it took another one hundred years to allow equal rights to the descendants of those who had been slaves.

Today we think it’s a “choice” to end a life begun in a woman’s womb. Certainly it is, as much as slavery was a “choice”. We think it’s a choice to marry someone of your same gender (well, some would say it’s not a choice…) and of course that is true, too.

We are all given choice. Free will. We can do whatever we’d like, really. The issue is the consequences, and the previously agreed upon “standards” that will govern a society, and our interaction with our neighbors. Clearly there are different thoughts, opinions, and “passions” regarding that currently in our society, and I think there will continue to be. (Partly I think we’re becoming less diverse because of the way we are educating our younger generations: teaching them what to think, rather than how to think.)

In the end we get to decide, and then we get to live with those choices. Nothing will change regarding abortion no matter which candidate we select. And if you believe that we as a society should mandate caring for the poor (or the not-wealthy) by taxing “the rich”, you’re not going to win over those who disagree simply by electing a candidate who will enact such policies.

Ultimately you can only “win” (read: enact true change) by educating people to the strengths of what you believe. People are smart, and can be trusted when given the facts. We are all endowed by our Creator with freedom to know and to choose. Whether we won or lost an election, nothing changed because of that. The only real change happens inside someone’s heart, and mind, and then spreads outward from there. (In their home/family, to their community, and beyond.)

(Note: I’m not sure that we want to make it our goal to change other people’s thinking. But, that is my inner libertarian coming out…)

We will not transform America (one way or another) by an election. Any election, with any result. But, God willing, we Americans will return to the One whom so many of the Founders knew and trusted, and repeatedly credited with the formation of this Great Experiment called the United States of America. I don’t see the majority of us being founded in our trust of Him. We are still a free people choosing and being our own government, though, not by force or lineage. That is unique in history, and was greatly celebrated when we accomplished it just two hundred thirty-six years ago.

It still should be today. Elections are wonderful. But don’t put too much stock in them for “accomplishing your mission”. They’re a good barometer of who we are, and what we think.

And there’s another one coming soon.

Last Words

Finally, for those who follow Jesus, I leave you with these two thoughts:

Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God. So anyone who rebels against authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and they will be punished. For the authorities do not strike fear in people who are doing right, but in those who are doing wrong. Would you like to live without fear of the authorities? Do what is right, and they will honor you. The authorities are God’s servants, sent for your good. But if you are doing wrong, of course you should be afraid, for they have the power to punish you. They are God’s servants, sent for the very purpose of punishing those who do what is wrong. So you must submit to them, not only to avoid punishment, but also to keep a clear conscience.

Pay your taxes, too, for these same reasons. For government workers need to be paid. They are serving God in what they do. Give to everyone what you owe them: Pay your taxes and government fees to those who collect them, and give respect and honor to those who are in authority. —Romans 13:1-7

And, most importantly…

…the LORD has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God. —Micah 6:8

by Greg

On Electing A President (And Other Election Day 2012 Thoughts)

Today is the first Tuesday in November, and that means we’re voting here in the U. S. of A.!

(But, if you’re alive, you are probably aware of that.)

And, every four years we get a little more excited because we are voting for the President! That’s big stuff!

While I will admit that it is, in a way, “big stuff”, I keep feeling like, it shouldn’t be.

Voting is definitely something we should be glad that we are able to do. We have a full voice in so many different races for so many different government positions (and various proposals, as well). That is not something we should dismiss, nor forsake.

But I keep thinking that the whole President thing gets so blown out of proportion. We treat our president as somewhat of a “king”. (Although, we are glad he’s only “king” for four years at a time, and for a maximum of eight years… except for FDR.) We presume and grant authorities to the Executive Branch that were not intended for one person to have. (There’s just something in us that longs for a king…)

It’s been going on for a while. And not just one party’s man. Executive orders, “czars”, budget proposals, laws, etc.

(Note: George W Bush and Ronald Reagan had such “officers” in abundance as much as Barack Obama, who is oft-criticized for his “czars”. From what I can tell, referencing posts appointed by the Executive as “Czars” goes as far back as Woodrow Wilson.)

These are not things the President/Executive is meant to be doing.

The Congress shall make the laws… The President will be the Commander in Chief of the armed forces, and has the power to convene and adjourn sessions of congress, and even make treaties, if two thirds of the Senators approve. And, well… I’m just going to quote it:

and he shall nominate, and by and with the Advice and Consent of the Senate, shall appoint Ambassadors, other public Ministers and Consuls, Judges of the supreme Court, and all other Officers of the United States, whose Appointments are not herein otherwise provided for, and which shall be established by Law: but the Congress may by Law vest the Appointment of such inferior Officers, as they think proper, in the President alone, in the Courts of Law, or in the Heads of Departments.

So, here’s the thing. When the first thirteen states decided to form the union we were all born into, they really didn’t want a king. They put nearly ALL of the power for everything in the hands of (1) the states, (2) the two branches of congress of those states, with equal and population-based representation, and (3) they checked that power with a very limited Executive officer (President), and a judiciary branch. But the true power was in the State and Local governments. (NOT in the Federal government.)

And really, that is what we have lost, and why we put SO much emphasis on this quadrennial election of one man (or woman).

They used to refer to our country in the plural, “The United States are …”, but of course, we have been ever-increasingly a large, amorphous single entity, “The United States is…”

And so, we spend millions of dollars, listen to endless debates, go through nearly two years of campaigning … for the one office of temporary king.

Fascinating.

The REALLY fascinating thing is, we still do the electoral college! Seriously? 🙂

For some reason, though we think “is” rather than “are” regarding our nation, we still rely on the Electors from each state to grant all of the votes from that state to one candidate (in theory) of their choosing. I don’t know (and am not going to look it up right now) if an Elector or a state has ever gone against the popular vote in that state since we have had popular votes, but… well, I guess they could?

Did you know there were Presidents elected who were not voted on by all the people? That was another indication in the Constitution of the limited role the President would play.

Each State shall appoint, in such Manner as the Legislature thereof may direct, a Number of Electors, equal to the whole Number of Senators and Representatives to which the State may be entitled in the Congress: but no Senator or Representative, or Person holding an Office of Trust or Profit under the United States, shall be appointed an Elector.

The Electors shall meet in their respective States, and vote by Ballot for two Persons, of whom one at least shall not be an Inhabitant of the same State with themselves.

And then, if there was a tie, the House of Representatives would vote to choose the President, with the second person on that vote being elected as the Vice President, with a tie there being broken by a vote by the Senate.

Again… fascinating.

In a republican government (please note the small “r”), the emphasis was on the representation in smaller units. First in a local community, choosing a representative in their state government, and then those representatives choosing some from among them to represent their state in congress with the other states of the union. Thus, in theory, you are actually represented. (With a lesser emphasis placed on the representation the further away from you it got.)

Somehow today (over many generations) we have slid into more of a view that the further away representative is the more important choice. I think there is some correlation between our love for big box stores and franchised/chain restaurants, but… I’m too tired to flesh that out. 🙂

I will vote today as soon as we can get to the polls. I look forward to it. I like voting for the people we know in our small town. I like voting for people who have similar views of government to mine.

I just like voting. I’m glad that we can.

And I hope you will. And encourage everyone you know to vote, too. (If they don’t know who to vote for, don’t just tell them who to vote for! Give them a quick overview of the options, and what they stand for. As unbiased as possible?) 🙂

Get out today and vote. It may not be a perfect system (or what the writers of the Constitution envisioned) but it’s still likely the best in the world, and we’re privileged to be part of it.

(And if you don’t like the results, then hit the campaign trails earlier next time! Either for your preferred candidate/representative, or YOU could be the representative! You never know …)

by Greg

Special Moments

Some days just have those moments.

Today has had plenty. (And not all good ones, mind you.)

Jen had a super-frustrating day with (she said) every one of the kids, who just wouldn’t listen to her at all. They only wanted what they wanted when they wanted it. Eventually, she just couldn’t take it anymore and walked away from what she was trying to do, attempting to clear her head.

(It was during this time that Jen decided to make soup, which is something she wouldn’t usually do, and without a recipe, which is something she definitely wouldn’t do! The best part? It turned out great! Was a nice “moment” for Jen to enjoy a great (tasty) bit of success in an otherwise hard day.)

At dinner, we came to another moment where I erupted into a very intense monologue full of very direct, clear reminders of things we’ve taught the kids since they came into this world. Very direct. Pretty loud. And I meant every word of it.

That was a moment.

Then Mom went out for the evening to do some shopping, but mainly to “clear her head”. Much needed, and hopefully she is being refreshed. (I’ll find out when she gets home!)

As the clean-up team took care of the kitchen (and the other two took care of the other rooms) I bathed the youngest two. They really needed it.

(Note: I am quite sick. Nasty head cold, stuffy, bad cough, just keep saying, “My head feels weird…” So… that makes for a more interesting bath time. Oh, and Cam is just as sick as me!)

That was a moment. (But not too bad, actually.)

The girls got their baths, and I got everyone dressed for bed and hair brushed and all that must be done. Then Alex got his quick shower and we were ready for the evening activity.

Tonight, it was singing.

I got my guitar, and a box of chord charts for worship songs, and we just started playing through them. Some the kids knew, most they didn’t. But that didn’t stop them from singing. And dancing. And smiling. And really LOUD singing!

That was a moment. A different sort of moment. (A heart-smile kind of moment.)

I encouraged Ian to get his bass guitar out, and Alex converted a plastic pumpkin trick-or-treat bucket into a percussive instrument, and suddenly we had a band. And even though we didn’t know the song to begin with, by the end of one song Julia had a huge smile on her face… and tears on her cheeks.

“I’m crying!” says little Julia Gayle. “Why are you crying, Julia?” I asked gently. “It’s just because of the singing!” She almost couldn’t believe that music could do that to you, but at the same time, she knew deep within her that it did do that to her.

That was a moment.

Then came bedtime. We usually play with a Dad-animated stuffed friend at some point. Tonight it was the stuffed friend, Baboo. (Cam’s name for his little red-white-and-blue doggie.) We laughed, we had fun, we hugged (Cam wanted two hugs..) and we prayed together for our family.

That was another moment. (After which Cam wanted another hug…)

Days are full of moments. Some are good, some are “eh”, and some are pretty bad (or really bad). I feel like today kinda had all of those for us. Maybe most days do. Sometimes we get tricked into focusing on the bad moments though and we miss the little good ones that are still there, or can be there if and when we look for them.

They’re there. They were for us tonight.

Keep your heart and mind and eyes fixed on Jesus, and he’ll show you the moments. He’s in the moments, actually. All of them.

And if we know that—and live that—that is what makes them special.